Facing the Challenges of Family Life

Facing the Challenges of Family Life There are all kinds of different families and all kinds of different challenges a family goes through. It can be difficult at times to navigate through those challenges and sometimes those challenges cause changes in the dynamic of a family, rather for better or for worse. There is a quote that I love that says, "The same boiling water that softens the potato hardens the egg. It's about what we're made out of, not the circumstances." In life, we will go through hard things, but it all depends on how we take it. We can let our hard times turn us cold and bitter and let them pull apart our family or we can learn from them and let them build up and strengthen our family. Which one do you choose with your family? Today I wanted to talk a bit about the life cycle of a family, the impacts of family crises, and ways we can grow closer to our families during hard times. The life cycle of a family is the stages and processes that a family goes through. The first cycle is the beginning. The couple is newly married and has no kids. What could be some stressors during this time? For many newly wedded couples, a stress is finances or education. Another stress could be deciding when the right time to have kids is, or dealing with fertility problems. The next cycle is parental/child-rearing. During this phase, the family is learning and adjusting to being parents. This, as we would probably expect, can bring many of its own stressors. Having children can also have an effect on a couple's marriage as both partners are spending their time in different ways and priorities have to change. The next cycle is the launching cycle. This cycle occurs when children begin leaving the home for work and college. This can cause stress in a family's life as things begin to change and the kids have to start making big decisions. Sometimes parents may have a hard time letting their children be independent. The next cycle is the empty nest cycle. This stage is after the kids leave the house but after retirement. Couples must learn how to be alone again. It is not totally uncommon for couples to get divorced in this phase because, after so many years of raising children and becoming distant, they have forgotten their love for each other. The last cycle is retirement when a couple is done working and has leisure time. At this point, couples may struggle to know how to fill their time, they may have a hard time remembering old hobbies, or it may be difficult for them to spend all day with their spouse. Each phase, though different has unique stressors and problems, and throughout our lives, we are constantly changing and figuring out how to deal with our stresses. In addition to the usual stresses of daily life, in our lifetime, we will all experience hard trials. It can be easy to grow distant from our family as a result of these hard times. During the pandemic, some families had major difficulties as they navigated the newly found time they were forced to spend together. Families who viewed the lockdown in this way, came out of lockdown more distant from each other than before. On the other hand, some families used it as a time to have fun together and to spend time together. These families found more love and happiness at the end of the lockdowns. It all depends on how we view our circumstances and what we choose to do with them. There are a couple of different things we can do to grow closer to our family during hard times. One is to always communicate in loving ways. It is very easy to get frustrated with our family, but we must always choose to communicate lovingly. Do things together! Make time for fun with your family. Get to know each other and learn their likes and dislikes. Express and validate emotions. Be a support to your family members! Our family is our greatest blessing. They are always there for us. As you go through hard things in life, stick together as a family and use it to grow closer together, not farther apart!