End of Class, Beginning of Forever

The time has come for my family relations class to come to an end! I am so grateful for the opportunity I had to take this class with Brother Williams. I learned so much about how I want my future family to be. For today's blog, I wanted to recap some of my past blog posts and list the top 5 things that I've learned. 1- There is strength and power that comes from building a family with a righteous mother and father that are married and bringing children into the world. The world has a very different view of what the family should look like. Today we see a dramatic increase in couples that cohabitate. There is a belief that we must “test run” marriage before getting married but research has found that this does not make your chances of staying together any better. We see an increase of children being born out of wedlock and an increase in divorces. I know that divorce isn’t the answer! I also know that children are so important to our Heavenly Father and to our own eternal happiness. Our families can protect us and give us strength and support. Despite the world's view of the family structure, I know how important it is. 2- My role as a woman is very important in God’s plan. There are some very inherent differences between men and women and each has a very important and necessary role in God's plan. Men and women have characteristics that go together and compliment each other. Children need to be loved and nurtured, but they also need to feel protected and secure. Mothers and fathers together can give their children these things. As a woman, oftentimes I have felt as though the characteristics I have are a negative thing. I am not very rough or tough but I know that I have my own strengths that aid in God’s plan. As we better understand gender and its purpose, we will be able to fulfill our divine potential in Heavenly Father’s plan. 3- There is a difference between healthy sex and unhealthy sex in a marriage. As we grow up, we are taught and we believe that sex is a bad thing but then as soon as you get married, anything is allowed. This was the view that I had until I took this class and took my Eternal Families class. I learned of the sacred nature of sex. Even in marriage, there are unhealthy ways that we can go about our physical intimacy such as Affection for its own sake vs. affection only leading to sex, being fully present and engaged vs. detached and passive, connection-based vs. Performance-based, and open and honest vs. secretive. As we work together with our spouse, we can figure out what works best for us so that we can have a healthy and joyful sexual life and marriage. 4-We will go through hard times but there are resources we can use to make it through each phase of our lives. In our personal lives and in our families, there will be different phases or cycles that we will go through and each of those cycles brings new challenges. The way we can get through those hard times is through learning how to communicate with others and how to problem solve with others. Family counsels are something that really stick out to me. In my own family, there wasn’t much communication. I recognize the benefits that could’ve come if we would’ve taken the time to counsel together as a family. This is something that I want to implement into my own home. I want to have executive counsels with my spouse, family counsels, and one on one counsels with my children. I hope that this will allow my children time to express their thoughts, feelings, and concerns and feel heard. 5- I want my husband and I to be equal partners as we parent. I have been so lucky to grow up with such an amazing father. I have learned so much from him! I also grew up with an amazing mother who I am so lucky to have! Both of them have taught me and impacted me in a different way. From my father I have learned how to work hard and rely on God. From my mother I have learned how to love and care for others. They are amazing but at certain times I felt as though they weren’t equal in their parenting. In this class I have learned how important it is for me to have a marriage where my spouse and I are both actively engaged in raising our children. Brother Williams told a very powerful story about his experience getting up in the night with his daughter. He very easily could’ve been bitter that he had to be awake, but instead he took it as a time to connect with his daughter. He didn’t take those moments for granted and was able to build a close connection with his children. I want my spouse to feel as close to my children as I do. I hope that I can always remember the amazing lessons that I have learned and build a righteous, strong, and loving family!