A Father's Impact

I read an amazing article that was written by “The Children’s Bureau” that was titled “A Fathers impact of Child Development.” It discussed the impact that a father has on a child’s life by focusing on 3 points: facts about a father's engagement, father absence, and tips for dads. Today in my blog I wanted to talk a bit about 5 things that stood out to me as I read the article. Infants can be equally as attached to the father as they are the mother. The first thing that caught my attention is that the article said that fathers and infants can be equally as attached as mothers and infants. This was interesting to me because I feel like there is an idea that a mother and her baby have a connection that is hard to recreate with the father but when both parents are involved with the child, infants are attached to both parents from the beginning of life. Father involvement using authoritative parenting (loving and with clear boundaries and expectations) leads to better emotional, academic, social, and behavioral outcomes for children. The effect that a father has on a child is powerful because we can see the positive results that come from a loving father with clear expectations and boundaries. According to the website, Children who feel a closeness to their father are twice as likely as those who do not to enter college or find stable employment after high school, 75% less likely to have a teen birth, 80% less likely to spend time in jail, and half as likely to experience multiple depression symptoms. These are amazing statistics! Although the absence of their father is not an isolated risk factor, it definitely can take a toll on the development of children. This is important to take note of, as many would argue that one parental role is more significant than the other. That is simply not true. Both parents are equally as important to the family! Mothers and fathers may be different and may play different roles in their families, but each has strengths and abilities to contribute and teach to their children. Exploitation and abuse According to the article, fatherless children are at greater risk of suffering physical, emotional, and sexual abuse, being five times more likely to have experienced physical and emotional abuse. These statistics are shocking. This made me wonder why this may be the case. Fathers provide a lot of protection, and they also provide extra supervision in a family, I think that may be a part of why those statistics are so high. Speak positively to, and about, their mother. Know your children and be known by your children. At the end of the article, it gives a list of helpful tips for fathers. One was to speak positively to and about their mother. This stuck out to me because I think a big influence on the way a child views or treats his mother depends on how his father speaks about her and treats her, and vice versa for a mother talking about her husband. Kids pay attention and notice those kinds of things! I also love the phrase “ Know your children and be known by your children.” Children need to feel known and loved and they also need to know their parents. Tell stories, spend time together, learn and understand each other. My own father is very loving, hardworking, spiritual, and understanding. I didn’t notice them when I was younger, but as I grow older and as I am preparing for marriage, I recognize the things I have learned from my own father. My dad has shown me what it looks like to have a strong and healthy relationship. Him and my mom have a loving and wonderful relationship and I have been lucky to have that example in my life. I have seen them in good times and hard times, and I have watched as they work through things together. My dad has also taught me how important it is to be in a relationship with someone stable. He is easy to be around because you always know what to expect. The last thing I learned from my dad was from his amazing example of always making the gospel a priority. Throughout my life I have seen my dad kneeling in prayer every night and waking up extra early to study his scriptures. He serves others and is one of the most selfless people I know. Because of him, I have a stronger relationship with my Heavenly Father. I am so grateful for my dad!